How space humbled me

I’ve been told that I think too much. Maybe this is one of those instances.

I’ve always had an irrational fear of space. Yet at the same time, a sense of indescribable awe towards it. When my mind wanders off, I somehow always find myself floating in the starry abyss. It shakes me to the bone, but also makes me feel calm.

I find it so amazing how space is seemingly endless, and that no human being can ever travel the whole vastness of it. The constellations of the planets and the stars are so beautiful, but going near them would be scary.

Thinking of space always humbles me. In my honest opinion, space is proof of God, because something so beautiful just cannot exist without any divine intervention.

I’ve always told myself that the world is huge. But on days where my mind strays, I get reminded that I am living on just one planet, that exists within one solar system, that is a part of a greater galaxy.

Then it hit me. Who am I? Who are we, as mankind, to so selfishly live life as though everything revolves around us, when the matter of fact is that our lives are so fragile. We act like we rule the universe, when it is actually the universe that owns us. Our life depends on the way the galaxy moves, and if it ever decides to cave in on us, there is nothing we can do to stop it.

That’s when I start thinking about the power of God, and his divine mercy. Given at any moment, God could wipe out our whole solar system if He wanted to. We are just one of His many creations, so you can imagine there’s a whole lot for Him to keep track of. And I doubt that is a problem to Him, because well, He’s God.

To err is human, to forgive is divine. Do you know why forgiveness is such a divine trait? Because God forgives, even when we’re not sorry, and this is so amazing, considering the fact that we’re merely like dust in the wind.

Someone once told me,  “God created the galaxies, the stars and the planets. Do you honestly think He is so petty as to punish people for small mistakes? He is not human. Learn to forgive others, and forgive yourself. We are no bigger than grains of sand, and insignificant in this life.”

God works in mysterious ways. And I think a huge part of me is in love with Him because of my love for the unknown. But one thing I know for sure, is that He is compassionate and has love that no man can measure up to. Thinking of His greatness really puts you in your place, and you start to understand that you’re not all that big.

I don’t know. Maybe I’m just thinking too much. I’m not exactly sure if I’m even making sense. It’s 6 am, and I can’t sleep, and all I see in my head are the nebulas.

30 October 2014

Shafiqah Othman Hamzah

Shafiqah is a Singapore-born Malaysian who is best known for her advocacy on social and human rights issues. She is notably known for her tweets and for being a columnist on Malay Mail.

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